


Changed My Mind

by littleleeds



Category: One Direction (Band)
Genre: Fluff and Angst, M/M, One Shot
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2013-01-02
Updated: 2013-01-02
Packaged: 2017-11-23 09:18:09
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,385
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/620529
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/littleleeds/pseuds/littleleeds
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Louis looked at him all concerned, the way Harry hated. He would prefer if Louis just kept on acting with Eleanor so Harry could live in his world of misery and self-pity; a world in which Louis didn’t care, “What’s wrong, love?” His soft, velvet voice echoed quietly through the back of the car and gave Harry chills. He felt Louis everywhere, whenever he was around. It wasn’t just when he spoke, it was when he breathed the same air, when his hand brushed against Harry’s exposed skin, or when his laugh captured the only thing Harry could listen to on repeat and never, ever get bored.</p>
            </blockquote>





	Changed My Mind

**Author's Note:**

> Based on "Changed My Mind," by One Direction.

Harry’s arm was tense at his side, his hand clenched into a fist and his knuckles white from the pressure. Louis was pushing his buttons and he didn’t understand why. They were all sitting in the van together and Louis and Eleanor were sitting next to each other, Eleanor snuggling her way into Harry’s rightful place between Louis’s neck and shoulder. She pressed her lips to his tender bruises there and giggled her high-pitched giggle that made Harry’s hair stand on end, “Guess I should’ve gone a bit easier on you last week if you still have marks, hm?” She waited for a response as Harry’s jaw clenched on it’s own accord and he turned to the window. She was either ridiculously stupid, or ridiculously overpaid if she was still convincing herself that Louis was interested. At least 20 seconds had passed and he hadn’t even answered her question, let alone sported love bites from her all day. Harry was convinced she must know the truth, that Louis was seeing someone else, but she probably didn’t know that the certain mystery lover was sitting a mere five inches from her slender frame. He snapped out of his trance when she cooed at Louis again, making him cringe, “Boo?” 

Harry turned his attention to Louis, waiting to see if he would put in any sort of effort with his lies. Every time he spoke to Eleanor, Harry waited for Louis to tell her. He waited for him to slip up, to get caught up in the lies and be forced to tell the truth. It was a terrible thing to wish, of course, but he couldn’t help himself. He dreamed of being able to cuddle up to Louis in the car on the way back from a long concert filled with electric looks and touches between them. He swallowed hard and willed his mind to think of something else, as Louis finally responded to his “girlfriend,” with a half-hearted, “Yeah, babe.” Harry watched as his - well, Harry wasn’t quite sure what he was, exactly - put his arm around the petite brunette’s shoulders and pulled her close, leaning over her shoulder and winking at Harry playfully, as if to remind him who he really belonged to.

Harry, blinded by love - not real love, of course, he and Louis were just friends… friends that kissed… a lot - beamed back at Louis until his attention was once again encaptured by the girl clinging to his side. He sighed quietly to himself and immediately tensed again, frustrated by the goings on in the car. Louis had winked at him. Winked! As if that willed all the negative tension in the car away. Harry’s curls fell onto his forehead, obstructing his vision ever-so slightly, as he shook his head to himself. He gripped the black leather interior beneath his hand and tried to distract his thoughts as they pulled up to Eleanor’s flat. Harry counted his blessings and moved to get out the car to let her out, as his door was on the side of the sidewalk. He stood in the cold and folded his rather muscular arms over his broad chest in huff, his thin cotton t-shirt doing nothing to protect him from the elements. He saw his breath come out in puffs of thin white and after a few seconds, he let his frustration get the best of him. He stuck his head in the rented car and snipped impatiently, “Shouldn’t you be going then?” 

Of course, the pair were snogging. They didn’t do it often, one could use the word “rarely,” even. Whenever Eleanor got the opportunity, she made use of it and it proved to be a task to get her greedy hands off whatever part of Louis she could manage. Harry pressed his rosy lips into a thin line, trying to control his anger, and once again stood upright outside of the door. He ignored Louis’s quiet chuckles and heard another quick kiss, before Eleanor emerged from the car. She looked rather unhappy, which appeased Harry slightly, and walked off in a huff without saying goodbye. Harry scoffed and clamored back into the car, anxious to get away from the cold and back to his flat as quickly as possible. The thought of sleeping alone loomed in front of him, as yet another wave of loneliness overcame him. It seemed to be the only two emotions he’d been feeling lately were lonely and frustrated, and as he turned his head the boy who caused both of those specific feelings was looking him straight in the eye. 

Harry’s breath caught and he instantly regretted agreeing to ride in a separate car to drop off Eleanor with Louis. Of course, it made the most sense, being that he and Louis lived in the same flat and he had no real - or at least, not one that he could say out loud - reason to dislike Eleanor. Louis’s hand covered one of Harry’s, as it once again gripped at the seat. Harry eyed the older boy’s hand and shook his head, shoving it in his pocket wordlessly. Louis looked at him all concerned, the way Harry hated. He would prefer if Louis just kept on acting with Eleanor so Harry could live in his world of misery and self-pity; a world in which Louis didn’t care, “What’s wrong, love?” His soft, velvet voice echoed quietly through the back of the car and gave Harry chills. He felt Louis everywhere, whenever he was around. It wasn’t just when he spoke, it was when he breathed the same air, when his hand brushed against Harry’s exposed skin, or when his laugh captured the only thing Harry could listen to on repeat and never, ever get bored.

He was not in love with Louis. He scolded himself for thinking such ridiculous thoughts as the older boy’s hands reached out for him, motioning him closer. Harry hesitated and shook his head vigorously, “No, Louis.” His voice sounded more firm than he actually thought he was, and he felt his stomach turn over as a flash of disappointment fell over Louis face. He dropped his hands into his lap and interlaced his fingers delicately, looking down at them and averting his eyes from Harry. Immediately, guilt washed over him and he wanted to reach back out for Louis’s hands and kiss each of his fingers and give him reasons why he loved him for each. Love - in a friendly way, of course. He opened his mouth to speak and words spilled out quickly in succession, more than he had originally planned, “I hate her, you know. You don’t even love her and she gets to hold you and kiss you…” He took a breath and as he got into the rhythm of what he was saying, his voice rose and his breathing came in huffs of pent-up frustration, “How could she possibly think those belong to her? That you belong to her anymore?” Exasperated at this point, and talking without thinking, he shouted, “You’re mine!” He collapsed into the leather seat and moments later, he felt hands on his forehead.

The loose curly tendrils of hair that he was too lazy to move, got tucked back into place by cool, thin fingers that played against his heated skin. He felt Louis slide next to him and press gentle kisses over the place where his fingers just graced over his forehead, “Oh, Haz…” He sighed and placed one of his hands over Harry’s knee, tracing small semi-circles into the denim with his thumb, “it’s not that easy.” He didn’t deny any of the previously mentioned notions, Harry noted, but he didn’t confirm any either.

His pessimistic side won him over as they pulled up to their shared flat. Harry pushed the door open and stepped out, the cold hitting his now overheated skin and chilling him quickly. He walked briskly up the steps, ignoring Louis completely, and opened the door with no intention of waiting for Louis at all. He didn’t have the heart to slam it behind him, but Harry walked away from the open door and walked into his room. He didn’t expect Louis to put any effort into the argument, as it was one they had before, because he had already won. Harry was asking the impossible, he knew, but he had never felt like this before. Louis could control every aspect of his emotions and he was unsure whether or not he was ready for something of this magnitude. Usually mellow, Harry’s outburst in the car was uncharacteristic and frightening to him. How would he ever be able to be involved with Louis, if he could go from cool, calm and collected to yelling and waving his arms about like maniac? He couldn’t. He wouldn’t! As he looked around his room, he came to terms with what he had to do. They were in a band together, obviously, but that was all. Neither of them had made any commitments to the other to live together forever, or keep this charade of “just friends,” going either. Harry grabbed an overnight bag from his closet and headed into Louis’s room; his room was, after all, just for show. Harry and Louis had shared a room from the moment they lived together and all Harry had kept in his rooms were a few items from his childhood home, notebooks filled with half-finished songs, and clothes packed in boxes that he never got around to unpacking. Not like Modest! let him keep most of his old clothes, anyway.

Walking into their shared bedroom, Harry found Louis sitting on the bed with his head in his hands, shoulders shaking in the semi-darkness. Immediately, his instinct was to drop his bag and run to him, but all he managed to do was drop his bag at his feet and clear his throat awkwardly to announce his presence. What else was there to do when your best mate/not-so-secret love/bandmate was crying, after all? He’d give all his millions to answer that question. “Lou?” He called out quietly when all Louis had done was lift his head and look in his general direction.

Louis motioned his head toward Harry’s feet and wiped at his already swollen eyes, “Going on a trip, Haz?” He looked up at Harry miserably and shook his head, returning his gaze to whatever held it on the floor before Harry had interrupted what appeared, from his eyes, to be completely breaking down. Looking at the scene before him pathetically, Harry was at a crossroads. He could cross the line into the unknown and take a leap of faith onto what he knew would be a tumultuous road, or he could play it safe and stay the night at a hotel until he found a flat better suited for him. One that didn’t come with a live-in heartbreaker, he reasoned.

Pulling himself back to Earth, Harry realized he still hadn’t explained where he was going. He sighed openly and picked up the bag that was at his feet, walking to his dresser and filling it as quickly as he could before he turned around and changed his mind. The sniffles and quiet sobs escaping from the smaller boy’s body were already enough. Each heart-wrenching sound that Louis let escape from his lips was another blinding stab of pain all over Harry’s body, and he would have to drag himself out of the room if he was exposed to it much longer. He turned on his heel and headed toward the door. His hand on the knob, he closed his eyes and whispered quietly, “I’m so sorry, Louis.” His voice broke on the last syllable and he just couldn’t seem to keep it together, his knuckles sore from gripping the door handle too hard.

He heard the springs on the bed gyrate and then a quiet voice plead brokenly to him, “Please..” Louis cleared his throat and spoke louder, but his voice was still thick was tears and heartbreak, “please, Harry, please don’t go.” His voice was begging now, tearing at Harry’s determination and warping his thinking as his body itched to grab Louis and rock him quietly until all his tears had dried tenfold. He started to turn and face Louis when he heard another murmur from the broken boy’s lips, “I want you stay.” He whispered pathetically to what seemed like no one in particular. 

Harry’s resolve snapped and he turned quickly, dropping his bag to his feet. Louis stood ten feet away, eyes red and bloodshot, looking as though he could have given on life itself right there on the spot. Closing the distance in strides, Harry had Louis in his arms in moments, their lips meshing together in kiss of pure need and intense desperation that Harry had never felt before. He felt Louis trembling in his arms, but his lips pressed against Harry’s just as hard and heated, as his arms snaked around his waist. The younger boy wiped at his love’s tears with his thumb gently as their lips moved in sync, showing just how much they belonged. As the kiss broke, both of them coming up for air, Louis sigh in an exhausted manner and let his hands slide into Harry’s, locking their fingers together.

Harry let one of Louis’s hands go, and led him into their bed with the other. They settled into bed quickly, both of them shot from the emotional turmoil that had escalated so fast. Harry opened his arms in bed, and Louis scooted into them as was customary, the two of them cuddling together effortlessly, as if they’d been doing it their whole life. Pressing soft kisses to any and all of Harry’s skin that Louis could find, he wore out quickly and could only muster a quiet mumble against Harry’s chest, “I was afraid you were going to leave forever.” It seemed almost like a confession as Louis’s grip on Harry’s torso tightened ever-so slightly, as if he was afraid Harry would slid out of his grasp and run away as soon as he got the chance.

Harry pressed his lips to Louis’s one final time for the night and, eyes closed and at peace, he murmured simply, “You changed my mind.”


End file.
